With the recent release of the (iconic) track “WAP” by Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion (two of my favourite artists ever), society’s obsession with women’s “modesty” (whilst simultaneously being obsessed with women’s sexuality) has been thrust back to the forefront of my mind. The widespread bashing of women who proudly display their sexuality is something I have always had a LOT of thoughts on, and have had to think about even more since starting my own business.
Society hates women who own, display, or profit from their sexuality. That’s the tea.
Since I started showing more skin on my social media channels, I’ve received a fair few comments on how I should consider the ways it will ‘affect’ my professional life. I’d be lying if I said it didn’t worry me, but I strongly believe society’s view that women cannot possibly be both sexual and professional is something that we should be challenging.
Because even now in 2020, it seems incomprehensible to many that a women can wear lingerie on Instagram and also be intelligent, business-minded and professional. You would not believe the amount of times that people ask what I do and violently recoil in shock when I tell them I’m a writer and a Psychology student who did well at school.
“OMG, beauty AND brains!!” they may say, as if women have to choose to embody one or the other.
And there’s no doubt in my mind that these reactions stem from a deep-rooted view that a women who chooses to be openly sexual, or to wear ‘provocative’ clothing is ‘spoiled’. As a self-employed woman, I am in the privileged position to challenge this view, and that is what I will do.
I regularly point clients to my blog so they can get an idea of my writing abilities, and seen as this is directly linked to my Instagram, has it crossed my mind that I should be more ‘modest’? Of course. But I refuse to bow down to these old-fashioned views that “slutty” women cannot also be intelligent and great at what they do (whatever that may be!)
Incidentally, some of the most brilliant, highly intelligent and business-minded women I’ve ever had the pleasure of following or getting to know online are sex workers.
And funnily enough, I’ve never had a client be put off by my blog or Instagram. In fact, many of my previous and current clients follow me on Instagram. Isn’t it the case that it’s often people from the outside looking in that seem to cast the most judgement on our ‘professionalism’?
Society hates multi-faceted women. Women are sexual or they are intelligent and can never be both. Well, I call bullshit on that, and I urge my fellow women to do the same (if you’re able). Do not allow a judgemental and patriarchal society to bully you into hiding certain aspects of yourself, your identity and your expression.
I am a writer, I am a businesswoman. I am intelligent, resilient and great at what I do.
And I do not have to hide my body to prove it.
Incidentally, one way I CAN prove it is via my Fiverr reviews – you can take a look here!
ALSO, if you haven’t listened to WAP yet, I would HIGHLY recommend doing so. I DARE you to listen to this and not have it in your head for the rest of the week.
For another post with the same idea in mind, check out this post I wrote many years ago on school dress codes. Because this is exactly where these views stem from, and I believe it’s incredibly damaging to society as a whole for women to have their bodies policed from such a young age.